During the first week after placement, I noticed that this sweet girl was not connecting and it deeply bothered me. I tried to show affection through hugs and cuddling and even that was met with “No, no”. I quickly noticed that ALL adults were mommy or daddy. She didn’t have any stranger danger and didn’t understand the difference between her caregiver vs someone she had just met. When I left her at the babysitters or we would leave visits, she never seemed to care … she would just say “Bye! Bye!”
Last week when I left her to go to work, she sat down and cried and said, “Mama, no go!” She clung for me and while I was so sad for her, I said a silent prayer of gratitude that she was showing a small sign of connection. As the week went on this continued to happen. At her visit, I shared this with the caseworker and she said, “That is amazing. She has not attached with anyone during this whole case.” I have seen her start to gradually request hugs and she is loving to give kisses. I have seen her go up and just grab my other daughter in an embrace.
This morning, as I was waking up I could hear her sweet little voice saying, “Mama! Mama!” When normally she just wakes up and stays on her bed until I come to get her. These are all such small things I have taken for granted with my other two daughters, but now I am realizing what a special thing these connections are.
So grateful to be a foster parent and to get to help her during this part of her journey.